17 Things All Vietnamese Kids Do…

After teaching the equivalent of a small Asian army over the last few months and then discussing the little rascals over hard earned after-school bia hois with other TEFL-ers, I’ve come to realise the kids here in Hanoi have a few things in common when it comes to classroom behaviour…

17 Things All Vietnamese Children Do

  1. Screaming at a Justin-Bieber-Fangirl-Losing-Her-Shit type decibel upon spotting an [alien] ‘Western’ person walking through the school gates
  2. Frantically touching my hair and face, gasping dramatically as they pick at my blonde hair
  3. Rooting around in their nostrils while maintaining direct eye contact throughout
  4. Wiping their snotty findings on their face, clothes, classroom neighbour
  5. Wearing only the most exclusive, state of the art, official merchandise:

    Chelsea Rip Off Hanoi Vietnam

  6. Slapping my bum. A lot. A lot a lot.
  7. Running across the playground at break neck speeds to excitedly ask me “WOTS YO NAME” before deciding to run away without waiting for any kind of actual response
  8. Tripping each other up whenever the opportunity arises
  9. Staring open mouthed whenever directly spoken to or looked at

    Staring Child Hanoi TEFL Vietnam

  10. Brutally turning on the weakest link in the class and viciously beating them to a pulp if they get any questions wrong and consequently lose a hotly anticipated STAR for their team
  11. Using the F word, and other naughties, randomly and totally out of context
  12. Proudly requesting to be stamped on their face when I am doing the congratulatory stamping rounds for the winning team

    Student Stamp Vietnam Hanoi

  13. Repeating e v e r y t h i n g I say in a high pitched, mock English accent, followed by hysterical giggles
  14. Screaming in horror when they catch a glimpse of my tattoos and aggressively attempting to wipe them away, still screaming
  15. All shouting “ME ME ME!” while vigorously waving both their hands in the air, only for me to choose them and for them to realise they don’t actually know the answer – or apparently, what’s even going on…
  16. Taking it in turns to spend the entire lesson picking head lice from each others’ scalps
  17. Being totally incapable of grasping the R pronunciation in APRIL and instead renaming me Teacher Apple

12805933_10206814612301686_296302874420421348_nApril And Friends VietnamCrazy Kids Hanoi VietnamKurupt FM Goes International Vietnam Edition


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